Bad Pickup Line + Bad Dancer + Bad Kisser = Bad Date
by an Anonymous Girlposse.com Reader

Me and my best friend were at a club, and this cute guy came up to me and said the corniest thing-"Hey baby, do you have a map cuz im lost in your eyes." I looked at him and just smiled then he said, "Did you have a nice trip.... falling from heaven?"I looked at him and asked him if thats the best he could do. He smiled and said, "No, im just kidding. I've been looking at you the whole night. Wanna dance?" I thought what the heck.

So I left my friend to go dance, but i found out he had his "own style" of dancing. Every minute he would either grab, squeeze, or pinch my butt, get really close and mutter something I couldn't understand, or pick me up and twirl me around. When we were done dancing we went outside and sat down on these benches kind of far from the place. All of a sudden he attacked me and started to kiss me. He put his tongue down my throat as far as possible like he wanted to swallow me whole. Then he viciously flapped his tongue up and down. I tried to push him off but he couldn't resist. After a while he started to swing his tounge side to side. He was the worst kisser ever. It was horrible, I started gaging it was so grose. I was so discusted im still tramitized to this day.

I saw him another night at the club, but when he came up to me i looked away and ignored him. I think he was offended because I could hear sniffles after a while and turned around to see him crying. I asked what was wrong and he said, "I don't think you like me." Then he just left. I never saw him again and I'm glad too. I guess people at bars are bad to date. I'm never doing that again!

~February 2004

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