A Halloween Kick in the Pants
by Gorilla

I had been dating Ted for five months, and Halloween was around the corner. Halloween had always been one of those days that I could count on as being fun. It also happened to be the birthday of two of my closest friends.

I went all out! I bought them both gifts, wrapped them really nicely, and spent three hours baking a cake for them that looked like a witch's cauldron. Then I got all dressed up and waited for Ted. The plan was dinner with about twenty friends and then a house party that would last 'till dawn.

Well, Ted was really uncomfortable around my friends because. . . actually I never figured it out, but anyway, he sat at dinner and didn't talk to anyone. He also told me that he was bored. This got to me a little, but I let it go because the party was going to be off the hook. After dinner we went to the house party. . . for like two hours. I asked him if it was okay if I did a body shot off my girlfriend. Ted said it was fine, so I went for it. He freaked out and said that we had to leave that second because he was way uncomfortable. So I reluctantly left and we fought until 5 in the morning. Later on I heard that the party was awesome and a lot of people that I hadn't seen in like five years had shown up.

Yeah, Ted's a little uptight. We dated for three more months, during which time he wasn't allowed to hang out with my friends. Oh, and he ended up ruining my birthday too. Some people just always need to be in control of every situation and to make sure that they are always the center of attention. You would assume that a 26 year old would have figured out that it was time to grow up. Oh, well! There is always THIS Halloween!!!

~February 2004

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