Dating No-No
The Convenience Boyfriend

I've been in college just over a year and a half and have brought home at least a lesson or two. The main lesson made sense enough to share with others who might be troubled by the same problem, or may be unknowingly doing this.

I dated a guy for three and a half years. We were deeply in love, and he was sincere: I had been friends with him from the start, knew his history from his own friends, and the relationship had blossomed into something more.

We did love each other, and I still feel for the guy. But after we moved on to college, I found that we were emotionally moving away from each other and didn't even realize it until we started to argue more. I personally realized that I had unconsciously kept the relationship going because it was convenient for both me and for him. He was there to buy stuff for me and to be a crying shoulder. I was his crying shoulder and class tutor. But the love part of the relationship was lost somewhere along the lines.

A convenient relationship is never a happy one unless you love each other.

My tip: If you find that you are dating someone who means a lot to you, but the love isn't there anymore, end it on a good note. The longer you wait the more built-up and nasty the break will come for the both of you. Do NOT keep him around just to buy you dinner or for appearance sake. It isn't fair to him or to you.

~by "Still hurting, but did the right thing", a Girlposse.com Reader
February 2002

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